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Why Your Gen Z Team Respects Your Title—But Not You
The 4 types of respect every leader must understand to avoid costly communication breakdowns
Matthias Miller
June 20, 2025
I’m temporarily sharing an office with a Gen Z’er.
He shared an interesting insight. “You need to understand that our generation holds different respect for roles vs. people.”
He gave an example. “You can have someone who will show up at the local fast food and show respect to their manager. As soon as they clock out, they’ll rant about the terrible person their boss is.”
If you don’t understand the difference of respect between roles and people, this behavior doesn’t make sense and seems inconsistent.
Here’s how it works.
A week before, I’d been speaking with Ellis Miller, founder & CEO of Silverloom. He shared about a communication breakdown that happened because of mismatched definitions of respect.
He pointed out that we have one word for respect, but we have four different meanings.
To understand those meanings, we need to understand two critical distinctions.
First, some respect is universal and some is individual. For example, everyone deserves respect because of the basic dignity and value of human life. However, not everyone show the character and skills that demand respect for their insight.
Second, some respect is earned and some is unearned. For example, the respect you get as a manager is unearned. It’s just because of your role. But if you treat others with kindness and you work with excellence, you’ll earn a different kind of respect.
Here’s what it looks like when you break it down into a matrix:
Universal | Individual | |
|---|---|---|
Unearned | You have respect because of basic human dignity. | You have respect because of the role that you hold. |
Earned | You have respect because your life experience allowed you to form an opinion. | You have respect because you’ve developed excellence in your skills and character. |
Two key takeaways:
When you’re talking to someone about respect, take the time to clarify what kind of respect you mean.
If you’re planning to lead a Gen Z workforce, don’t assume that the respect they hold for your role is the same as the respect they hold for you as a person.
The good news?
Exceptional leaders are, and will always be, in high demand.